How to Comfort Those in Hospice

Moving a loved one into hospice care is never an easy process. Families often feel overwhelmed by a range of emotions as they try to offer help and support in a situation they have little to no experience with. People may also be overly-worried about saying the “wrong” thing to their loved one, despite their intentions being good.

When you hear the word “hospice” it may conjure negative feelings and emotions, but helping a loved one transition into hospice care can be a peaceful experience with the right mindset. Our South Jersey hospice team has shared some tips on how to create a comfortable, tranquil environment for your loved one in hospice care.

Dim the overhead lights. We’ve all been in offices and shopping malls with bright, overhead fluorescent lighting, so you can imagine how uncomfortable bright lights can be to those with certain sensitivities and illnesses. If it’s possible, we recommend keeping the overhead lights switched off and using several lamps throughout your loved ones room instead. Lamps provide softer, gentler light that is easier on the eyes and creates a more relaxing atmosphere. 

Don’t be afraid to sit in silence with your loved one. Sitting in silence doesn’t need to be an uncomfortable experience. Both you and your loved one are processing many emotions and thoughts. Your physical presence alongside them is often a big comfort in and of itself. Sitting in silence allows everyone to work through their feelings, practice meditation, and if you’re religious, it can be an ideal time to pray. 

Maintain a quiet environment. People in hospice can easily become overwhelmed by loud sounds, bright lights, and too much general commotion. Don’t leave the TV turned on all the time, and when it is on keep the volume low. Don’t speak too loudly with other people while in your loved one’s room. Minimizing loud noises and commotion can help your loved one avoid feeling agitated and stressed.

Adapt a gentle touch. Things like gently holding a loved one’s hand or a soft touch on the arm can be very comforting to those in their final stages of life. Gentle touches let your loved one know you’re there and it helps them feel connected with you.

Jersey Shore hospice care

Making the decision to put a loved one in a hospice care community is never an easy one. Terminally ill people often reach a point where they need around-the-clock specialized assistance that may be difficult or impossible to administer at home.

At Bridges at The Shores, our hospice community in Cape May County, we strive to provide a peaceful, nurturing environment for all of our residents. Our multidisciplinary approach includes nurses, social workers, chaplains and pain management specialists who attend to our residents’ physical, social, and emotional needs. Our priority is making both our residents and their family members feel as comfortable as possible.

For more information about hospice care at UMC at The Shores in Cape May County, please contact our team today. Our South Jersey hospice team is here to support your family every step of the way. 

To learn more about hospice care in South Jersey, please visit our website at: https://theshores.umcommunities.org/

Original blog posted on https://umcommunities.org/hospice/how-to-comfort-those-in-hospice/

Don’t Wait Until It’s Too Late to Talk About Hospice

 

There are many topics we find extremely difficult to discuss, and hospice care is definitely one of them. We don’t often sit around with family and friends discussing what should happen if we ever require hospice care, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a plan in place. Unfortunately, terminal illnesses can strike anyone at any time and being unprepared can make a difficult situation more stressful.

When a loved one falls terminally ill, it’s likely that family members will have varying ideas on how to proceed without a hospice care plan in plan. Valuable time will be wasted while everyone tries to come to an agreement. As a result, your loved one may end up spending unnecessary time in a cold and clinical setting or an emergency room instead of being comfortable in their own home, surrounded by family.

In the same way that you prepare a Last Will and Testament ahead of time, we recommend that you and your family members create a hospice plan. This should include instructions on what to do if someone is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Everyone has certain wishes respective to their own situations, and it’s beneficial to the whole family if these plans are established well in advance of ever needing them.

Why it’s never too early for a hospice care plan

• Pain management may complicate things. While many people can enter hospice care from the comfort of their own homes, some people require additional medical support. Rather than stay at home, some people may find it easier to live in a dedicated hospice care community, where staff is available 24/7.

• The faster you’re able to act after a diagnosis, the more comfortable everyone will be. Receiving a terminal diagnosis will affect each member of the family differently. Each person will suggest doing what they think is right. As mentioned above, valuable time slips away when families go back and forth trying to decide the best course of action. Having a solid plan in place will eliminate any difficult and distressing conversations between family members that could lead to conflict.

• It alleviates the feelings of guilt and confusion surrounding important medical decisions. Trying to make important decisions while in a stressful situation is never easy, and feelings of guilt and confusion are very common. Having a set plan in place may not completely eliminate guilt and confusion, but you will have more peace of mind knowing the hospice care plan reflects your family member’s decision and you honored their final wishes.

Hospice care in Cape May County, New Jersey

Being prepared protects you and your family from additional stress, and eases the emotional burden of transitioning a loved one into hospice care. We understand it’s a difficult topic of conversation, but every family member will appreciate having clear instructions should the moment ever arrive when they need to follow them.

Hospice care in Bridges at The Shores provides residents with a tranquil environment where their comfort is top priority. We understand that having a loved one in hospice care greatly affects the entire family, and we have support systems in place to address the mental, emotional, and spiritual needs of the whole family. We believe that everyone deserves a dignified and peaceful end-of-life experience, and when you become involved with a community like ours, you and your family will never be alone.

For more information about hospice care at The Shores, or if you have questions about any of our other senior living communities across New Jersey, please contact United Methodist Communities today at: https://theshores.umcommunities.org/contact/

Originally posted: https://umcommunities.org/blog/dont-wait-until-its-too-late-to-talk-about-hospice/

How to Talk to Your Children About a Loved One with Terminal Illness

When a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness it’s always difficult for the entire family and it can be especially difficult for children who may not fully understand the gravity of the situation. While some people may be hesitant to explain a terminal diagnosis to a child, it’s important to recognize that children are a part of the family and deserve to know what’s happening just like any other family member. 

There is no “best time” to talk to your children about a loved one with a terminal illness, but The American Cancer Society recommends having difficult conversations sooner rather than later. Giving children the necessary information allows them to ask questions and to process the situation at their own pace. As you figure out what works best for your family, here are several tips that can help you talk to your children.

Ask someone else to be there with you when you have the conversation. It can be another family member or a close family friend as long as it’s someone your children trust. They can help you answer any questions and it’s helpful for your children to know they can come to both of you if they have any questions. 

Use simple and straightforward language. It’s understandable that you want to be as gentle as possible but saying things like your loved one is “going away” or “going to heaven” can confuse children, causing them to think the person may return. Take the time to explain to them what dying means and be sure they understand what you’re saying.

Don’t hold back from showing emotions. It’s understandable that you want to be strong, but being vulnerable and showing emotions lets your children know it’s okay for them to do the same. Reassure your children that it’s not their fault and it’s okay for them to react emotionally also. 

Encourage them to ask questions. Most children will have questions whether immediately or in the coming days and weeks. At UMC we know it can be difficult when you don’t have all the answers, but we recommend answering openly and honestly. Let them know they can come to you at any time, and that no questions are off-limits.

Supporting your kids during a difficult time

It’s natural for parents to want to protect their children and to feel like you must reassure them that everything will be okay. But when a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness it’s important to be honest with your children so they understand the reality of the situation. It’s also important to let your children know that no matter what happens, they are still loved and will continue to be loved and cared for. When going through a difficult and uncertain time kids sometimes think it’s their fault and that something they’ve done has caused the situation, so be sure to let them know this isn’t true.

Another way UMC recommends supporting your children during this difficult time is to adhere to their usual routine as much as possible. Daily routines are very helpful in providing structure and stability, and all of us – especially children – thrive from routine. It may require the help of family and close friends, but it will ease the stress and uncertainty for your kids. 

If you’d like information about our hospice and palliative care community Bridges at The Shores in South Jersey or if you’re interested in scheduling a virtual tour of our facilities, please contact us today. We look forward to hearing from you.

Original content posted on: https://umcommunities.org/assisted-living/how-to-talk-to-your-children-about-a-loved-one-with-terminal-illness/

 

Advice on Supporting Your Grieving Parent

 For those of us with elderly parents, supporting them through the loss of a spouse, family member, and close friend is an inevitable part of life. Your parent has supported you, comforted you, and guided you throughout your life, but that doesn’t mean they’ll never need support from you, especially when they lose someone close to them.

Everyone grieves differently, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to supporting your grieving parent. It’s especially difficult when your parent loses their spouse, because that means you are also dealing with the loss of a parent or a stepparent and must manage your own grief while still supporting your surviving parent. However, there are things you can do to help them during this difficult time.

Make it clear you’re available to listen, but don’t pressure them to share their feelings

Grieving is a process, and everyone goes at their own pace. Some parents might feel eager to talk about the person they’ve lost by sharing memories, fun times, and stories from the past, while others need some time to themselves to process their loss. You can be there for your parent by letting them know you’re available to listen if they want to share, but don’t force them.

Help them with tasks around the house

When you’re grieving, even the smallest task like taking out the trash can feel like an insurmountable obstacle. It’s very easy to fall behind on things like cleaning, laundry, dishes, cooking, grocery shopping, and other everyday tasks. Helping around the house will give them some much-needed relief while they grieve.

Ask them if they want to celebrate special dates or anniversaries

If your parent has lost their spouse, perhaps they still want to commemorate their wedding anniversary or their birthday. It can seem small, but remembering the good times and honoring special dates like birthdays can be healing to those who have lost someone special.

Help them adhere to whatever their routine was before their loss

When your parent is grieving, you can’t expect things to return to normal right away. But as time passes you can encourage them to return to their routine, which may include things like going for a morning walk or meeting friends for coffee. Routines often provide a sense of comfort and can help your parent move on after a loss.

If your parent has lost their spouse, this is understandably a sad and difficult time for your family, especially if the deceased had a hand in caring for the survivor. Now that you’re the sole caregiver, you may feel overwhelmed. Your parent may need a level of care and support that you’re unable to provide, especially if they have any medical issues. You deserve to know that your parent can access specialists who can meet their needs, respect their independence, and be there for them when you can’t.

If you’ve considered assisted living for your parent but are unsure if it’s the right choice, we encourage you to call us and speak with a member of our team. We provide around-the-clock care and practice a dignity-centered approach, ensuring our residents have the best quality of life possible.

Learn more about hospice care in South Jersey

We understand that considering hospice care for your aging parent can be a difficult and complicated decision. To learn more about UMC’s hospice care in South Jersey, please contact us today. We look forward to speaking with you.

Original content posted on https://umcommunities.org/blog/advice-on-supporting-your-grieving-parent/

What is a Patient Advocate and 4 Ways They Can Help You

For people in hospice care, having a patient advocate can ensure they receive the best care. A patient advocate is someone who helps guide your loved one through their end-of-life journey. This includes everything from attending doctors’ appointments, to talking with pharmacists, to going to specialist visits, and much more. Patient advocates are experts at helping people communicate their healthcare needs and interpreting information from health care providers. They ensure your loved one has all the necessary information required to make the best decisions for themselves.

Here are 4 ways in which patient advocates can help:

1. They maximize doctors’ visits. Most of us are familiar with the system – you often get a limited amount of time with your doctor and you can easily run out of time before discussing everything on your mind. For patients with complicated medical histories, this time limit can be even more stressful. Patient advocates help by going into to each doctor’s appointment with a plan, and ensuring all concerns are addressed and questions are answered.
   
   
2. Patient advocates help the patient get all the information they need about their care. Doctors’ visits can be intimidating, and it’s normal to feel overwhelmed with the amount of information received. Working with a patient advocate ensures that there are no knowledge gaps or critical information that has been miscommunicated or misunderstood.
   
   
3. They reduce stress and provide comfort. It’s very common to feel stressed and anxious when attending doctors’ appointments. For people who have serious medical conditions and require multiple visits to multiple doctors, this stress can be bad for their health. Patient advocates step up to deal with the most confusing and frustrating parts of doctors’ visits, offering much-needed relief to the patient.
   
   
4. Patient advocates help patients navigate the health insurance system. After several doctors’ visits, the last thing a patient wants to do is deal with complicated insurance paperwork. Patient advocates ensure that the patient was billed correctly and can help reduce costs, while completing the necessary forms on the patient’s behalf.
   

In assisted living, there are ‘built in’ patient advocates

Making the transition into hospice care is a journey that the entire family takes together, . Bridges at The Shores is a premier hospice, and we’re committed to providing a serene, peaceful environment for our residents. We’re proud to be the go-to hospice for so many people in our community. We believe that the needs, desires, comfort, dignity, and quality of life of all our residents is of the utmost importance, which is why our onsite team includes a registered nurse, social worker, chaplain, certified nursing aide, and other specialists who concentrate on care, including pain management and emotional support.

Creating and maintaining an environment that allows our residents to enjoy a meaningful transition into hospice care is something we are passionate about at Bridges at The Shores. Our hospice is designed with consideration for every possible need our residents may have, and we are fully equipped to provide care, medication assistance, physical therapy, and often-needed comfort and support.

We understand the decision to place a loved one in hospice can be difficult, and we do everything possible to ease the transition for your loved one and your entire family. To learn more about hospice care at Bridges, please contact us today. We look forward to speaking with you.

Original content posted on https://umcommunities.org/blog/what-is-a-patient-advocate-and-4-ways-they-can-help-you-2/

What is Terminal Lucidity?

Every individual reaches the end of their life in their own way. Often, this time brings unexpected feelings, events, and phenomena.  One of these phenomena is terminal lucidity. Here’s some insight into what this mysterious rally is all about, from our hospice community in South Jersey.

The Phenomenon of Terminal Lucidity 

What causes terminal lucidity, also called an end-of-life rally. Why some residents experience it while others do not remains unknown. However, it’s a fairly common event when patients close to the end of their life suddenly experience a boost to their physical and mental state. Dementia and Alzheimer’s patients can suddenly recognize loved ones and speak clearly, and those struggling at the end of severe illnesses suddenly have the energy and clarity of mind to connect with their loved ones.

Although confusing for many families and caregivers, it can be a wonderful experience to see a loved one become more alert after months of decline. Terminal lucidity tends to fade rapidly and often indicates a loved one is close to the end of their journey. Therefore, families should treasure whatever solace it brings rather than it becoming a cause for false hope.

What Causes Terminal Lucidity?

Current thinking is that terminal lucidity can result when a resident stops medical treatment for terminal conditions. These medical treatments tend to cause side effects that can be detrimental to the mind and body; once the resident is no longer on them, the mind can become more responsive. Terminal lucidity may occur because patients cease medical treatment and opt for care that prioritizes comfort rather than a cure.

An Opportunity to Connect and Honor Final Wishes

Family members, caregivers, and hospice associates use these last moments of lucidity to show residents additional care and attention. Many use these moments to make special requests to see loved ones, listen to specific music, and even eat their favorite dessert!

Residents are usually aware that these are among their final moments, making it important that loved ones are prepared to fulfill final requests and be present to enjoy this last time together.

Quality, Compassionate Care at Our Hospice in South Jersey

At The Shores, a part of the well-known United Methodist Communities non-profit organization in New Jersey, we offer compassionate, professional hospice care in the Jersey Shore area in a community called Bridges. In this program, we focus on creating a nurturing and comforting environment for residents and their loved ones through customized care programs and compassionate support. 

To find out more about our hospice in Cape May County, please visit our website at https://theshores.umcommunities.org/hospice-care-nj/ or contact us today to organize your visit.

Original content posted on https://umcommunities.org/blog/what-is-terminal-lucidity/